Ba Humbug!?

Perhaps.

Yes, I am indeed and certainly going on a Doctor Who hunger strike protesting the replacement of David Tennant with one Matt Smith. Surely…days away from already filmed and edited swan song of The End of Time…there is still time for my mighty one-man protest to have its desired effect.

And…no…that’s not really reality…

However, I will in fact NOT be watching either The Waters of Mars or The End of Time specials until their eventual release on DVD, Netflix, or iTunes in February 2010.

Oh…there is, I think, only very little that is noble about this boycott. I had once had cable and though I am still very much addicted to television as a product, I am now very much against it as a medium, having been spoiled by the relatively on-demand, only slightly delayed, instant-ish view nature of Hulu and Netflix. For the most part, all other televised shows that I have an interest in have been distributing their new and old episodes online. The only standout and perhaps my greatest burning passion, Doctor Who is somewhat significantly slower in its release of David Tennant’s last specials.

It has…almost broken me. I had bounced back and forth arguing whether or not to resubscribe to cable for the Holidays. I had bounced..until…I actually called the cable company and found that it would be an additional $50 and a $20 installation fee for an appointment no one may be able to make prior to the airing of the actual episodes I wished to watch.

Indeed, a separate bitch about the cable company is the fact that I can not simply pick up a bloody cable box from their office at my leisure and just plug the damn thing in myself. Fuck that noise.

Could I instead watch the episodes in varying degrees of quality in some pirated fashion? I have the capability, indeed. I’m also not too concerned about the potentially piss-poor visual quality that I would be subject to. No, I am simply properly crippled by the logical morality that would have anything that I desire that is not mine having value because of that desire. Therefore, if I do not reciprocate that value in an exchange expressly agreeable to the object of my desire’s owner (monetarily or participating as an audience to advertising), it would have me sleeping rather uncomfortably guilty.

Yes Virginia…there is some morality. Not much…but some…

Logic is not so much a fickle mistress, but if you try sometimes…you might just find…you can’t get what you want. FUCK!

Still, I find that preferable to the normal clusterfuck rationalizations of, “FUCK IT! I WANT IT!” or “FUCK IT! EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING IT!” that effectively negates all logical moral foundations for the other laws we tend to like…a little more.

Oh…but enough of that. This is about Doctor Who and I would be hard pressed to relate much or any of Doctor Who to anything resembling logic…

And The Sporadical is just so much about breaking news that the entire process appears to be broken, my protest apparently having its effect even before I was finished writing this very article that threatens its beginning…the internets just now alerting me that “The Waters of Mars” has very recently been released on iTunes. Consider it…consumed.

Perhaps this means I will not have to wait as long as I had feared for the Christmas specials comprising “The End of Time” to be released. However, there will still be some lag between mine and the original airing, so please do not spoil the fact that there’s a lot of crying when The Master dies in all probability while killing The Doctor who regenerates into Matt Smith, who promptly changes clothes to something far less interesting, picks up an underage girl and commences on a series of very interesting, yet EMO adventures.