Video Games

The Nintendo 3DS Impedes Urination

by March 27th, 2011 Culture » Video Games »

Saturday Night. Union Square, New York City Best Buy. Nintendo spontaneously decides to launch their new stereoscopic 3D handheld video game system, 3DS, so that they had an excuse to close down the Best Buy and deny my very urgent need for its public bathroom. DAMN YOU NINTENDO! After mad-dashing through the closing minutes of […]

Super Hepatitis Taco 3: Ultimate Championship Edition Alpha 5

by February 28th, 2011 Science » Culture » Video Games »

As I tremble in stupid anticipation of my impending epidural, my mind turns to the last time my imagination was traumatized by an impending medical procedure. When I was around 7 years old, my father and I stopped one night to grab some tacos at Taco Bell. A week or so later, there was a […]

Paperboy: The Life

by February 27th, 2011 Culture » Video Games »

The world to me, most days, seems like the old NES video game, Paperboy – where my attempt to complete any simple task is thwarted by people who are not actual people, but rather moving pixels with only enough crudely constructed artificial intelligence to make themselves an obstacle. RC Cars, some asshole break-dancing, a dog, […]

Revenge of Return to Son of Monkey Island

by July 26th, 2009 Culture » Video Games »

image copyright Telltale Games and LucasArts You know…there was a time when my mind wasn’t always the near perfectly functioning abstract steel trap that it is today. Yes…there was indeed a time I would have never thought of putting a bomb in a pair of frilly pink bloomers left to dry and explode on a […]

The Sporadical skeptically promotes the following:
SKEPTIC Reason Penn and Teller Frank Zappa