Sports

In NBA news…the Mavericks finished their sweep of the Lakers today, ending coach Phil Jackson’s career by demoralizing Los Angeles 122 – 86, causing Mavericks owner Mark Cuban to ejaculate so hard that it just now landed in my apartment in New York City.

Photograph of the very first documented Cricket game. I have a strong, strong suspicion that no one actually understands the game of Cricket. Ever since inception, players have simply swung some things, thrown others and run around without purpose, pausing now and then to make bold claims that they have scored points, claims that go […]

I remember when I think it happened. I was playing basketball, one-on-one, and I was in a rare Dirk Nowitzki can-not-miss mode while playing much better defense than the my NBA reference. I had a bit of a throbbing pain in my inner thigh, but I told myself, “Just play through it, pussy. How many […]

So excited was New York Jets‘ Head Coach Rex Ryan after the teams impressive 28-21 win against the New England Patriots, that he lost all control, ran onto the field, grabbed running back Shonn Greene as if to hug him before spinning him upside down, tearing off his cleats and forcing his entire left foot […]