by Jason Thomas Kocher July 8th, 2008 - Polls » Politics »
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My scientists have formulated that putting these polls into posts under their own category will not only pad my stats and make slightly mightier the girth of this fine site, but will also – shockingly! – organize the damn things so that they may be better perused in their later years.
First up…the 2008 US Presidential Election.
I have seen very little coverage of this event on YouPorn and have as such pooled what little information I could gleam from the ever smaller tubes of the internets. Collected here in this poll are all currently known candidates for the 2008 US Presidential Election.
Remember: VOTE OR NOT!
Already, Pier Paolo Pasolini has raced out to a commanding lead with 2 votes. This comes as no surprise. He is a fierce political warrior. While some may criticize his being dead, he [...]
by Jason Thomas Kocher June 5th, 2008 - Poetry »
Plaid White Laminate Lard
Typecast in textbooks
A silky circular creamy scar
Turn the fire on
Turn the fire on
Turn the fire on
Orange fuzzy partitions
Dividing departments
The precipice tipped off
A tick to a tick
Words take their form
A memorial
carved into
Our Plaid White Laminate Lard
by Jason Thomas Kocher February 5th, 2008 - Surrealpolitik »
Can we handle another “Super” thing this soon? Will it mean anything more than the game Sunday? Who’s running? Where is my toe? DEAR GOD, WHERE IS MY TOE!?
We have only to hope that Super Tuesday won’t mirror the Super Bowl. Waiting three quarters for action between the Giants and Patriots was tolerable, but my patience will not go relative with the longer scheme of a Presidential election. I want to see someone beat the hell out of everyone else in each party. I’ve gone purely entertainment again. It doesn’t matter who. Let’s just get on with it.
However, there is a more practical angle to this as well. George W. Bush has done nothing good in the 7 something years he has been in office — OK, maybe he petted a puppy or something…so at least some dog somewhere is [...]
by Jason Thomas Kocher January 3rd, 2008 - Sporadical »
Today, for some reason, I had to wear a shirt. This caused great concern initially, but eventually I picked one of the many that littered the floor. I would have been squarely knocked on my ass if the wall hadn’t been directly behind me. The chosen one smelled exactly like Walnutport. But this shirt lives 2 – 3 hours away from there, has certainly not visited recently and, to the best of my recollection, has never felt the grey sun of Walnutport on its grey cotton.
Let me explain why this is important…by way of an olfactory adventure. It is the same type of alarm that causes one to ask “Why does my hand smell like my ass?!” even in mixed company.
This particular stink is the stink of your family gathered for the holidays…true heart-felt love amongst kin…but it smells…unavoidably. [...]
